Sunday, August 07, 2005

Revenge of Bride of Blog...

Let's see, it's August and my last blog was in February. Six months should be enough time to let the world recover.

I'M BAAAAAACK!!!

For now I'll only be blogging once a week. Sundays, to be exact. That's my day on the computer. We've gone from a three computer household to one. Yep, we're pretty bohemian around here, these days.

So, you're probably wondering what I've been doing for the last six months. I can sum it all up in one small word... Ha! No, that's not what I've been doing. That's what I say to being able to actually explain it. Of course, I'm also assuming that the insane people who read this blog are wondering what I've been doing and not breathing a collective sigh of relief that I'm sparing the world my peregrine ramblings.

I'll try to compress some of the more salient changes into a brief list.

1) The book's on terminal hold until further notice. Not enough time since I took a nine to five. That may change and very soon... more as things develop.

2) I've discovered that my faith has changed considerably since I started meditating. I've been told that questioning your faith tends to happen when you suddenly start remembering things from your past lives and discovering that you have some remarkable spiritual gifts. I'm just saying...

3) The Topaz, though not perfectly healthy, still lives. We also have a second car, now, thank you to my future in-laws who have single-handedly proven to me that parents can actually be kind, loving, supportive and even friends.

4) My health is excellent. My diet varies but I struggle even more than before because I no longer eat any kind of red meat. Only seafood and, VERY rarely, some chicken. No more eggs, either. Believe it or not, I've done things with tofu that have even surprised me.

5) Jackie and I are doing well and she and the girls are still the center of my universe. The nineteen year old moved back in with her grandmother just after she broke up with her boyfriend. The fourteen year old is still brilliant and full of life and the nine year old is still so completely amazing because she notices things that people five times her age miss completely. Jackie and I should be getting married very, very soon. Again, more as things develop...

Okay, so I can't think of anything really poignant to talk about, even though the news has been fraught with interesting topics. Let's just reunite with a top ten about my life in an apartment full of women.

The Top Ten Things I've Actually Said In The Last Six Months:

10) "Okay, loaf of white bread, cheddar cheese, vegetarian refried beans and long-super maxis with wings."

9) "Where does one find strawberry glitter gloss?"

8) "Why does my hair brush smell like the cat box?"

7) "No, I am not seeking revenge for what you did to me three lifetimes ago, I swear."

6) "For the love of God, and all that's holy, don't ask me about your outfit. I'm male, remember?!?!"

5) "So far, when I try to meditate, I've been attacked by birds, bats, roaches, cats and kids but the worst obstacle is the neighbors screaming religious epithets while having sex."

4) "Does anyone know why my underwear is in the kitchen cupboard?"

3) "You can date any boy you want, right after I scare the crap out of him."

2) "You mean all three of you just started your cycle at the same time and the world hasn't exploded? It's like a menstrual miracle."

and the number one thing I've actually said in the last six months:

1) "Will you please not dry your bra by hanging it out the window of the car!"

See you all next week!

Quote for the week:

“No one should abandon duties because he sees defects in them. Every action, every activity, is surrounded by defects as a fire is surrounded by smoke.” ~ Lord Krishna from The Bhagavad Gita